Why You’re Not Broken: The Myth of ‘Fixing Yourself’ in Therapy

If you’ve ever thought, “Something’s wrong with me… I need to be fixed”, you’re not alone. Many people come to therapy believing they are somehow broken — that a part of them is defective and needs repairing.

This belief is very understandable. We live in a culture that often frames emotional struggles as problems to be solved, weaknesses to be eradicated, or flaws to be “fixed.” But here’s the truth: you are not broken. And therapy isn’t about repairing you as if you were a faulty machine.

Where the “Broken” Story Comes From

The idea that we need fixing often takes root in childhood or through difficult life experiences. Maybe you were told you were “too sensitive,” “too much,” or “not enough.” Perhaps, you’ve faced loss, trauma, or times when you felt rejected or unseen. These moments can quietly plant the seed of self-doubt: there’s something wrong with me.

Over time, these beliefs can become so ingrained that we start to mistake them for facts. They can show up as harsh self-talk, perfectionism, shame, or a constant drive to be “better” — without ever feeling like we’re enough.

What Therapy Really Does

Therapy is not a workshop for repairing broken parts. It’s more like a safe room where you can gently unpack the stories you’ve been told about yourself, and decide which ones you want to keep.

Rather than “fixing” you, therapy helps you:

• Understand the origins of your thoughts, feelings, and patterns

• Develop compassion for your younger self and your present self

• Build new ways of relating to yourself and others

• Recognise your strengths and resources, even when you feel low

Therapy is less about changing who you are and more about coming home to yourself.

You’re Already Whole

You might be carrying pain, sadness, anxiety, or confusion — but these are experiences, not definitions. You are not your mistakes, your past, or your mental health diagnosis. You are already whole.

When we shift from “I’m broken” to “I’m human”, space opens for healing. Therapy supports that shift, not by “fixing” you, but by helping you see the parts of yourself that have been there all along — resilient, resourceful, and worthy.

A Gentle Invitation

If you’ve been holding onto the belief that you need fixing, perhaps you can experiment with a different thought: I am not broken. I am learning, healing, and growing.

Therapy can be the space where you explore that truth, at your own pace, with someone walking alongside you.